Joyska's Journal: February 2005











Sunday, February 27, 2005

Too tired to type...

Long day... 32 kids 5 and under... love them! Not alone, but still sickish and now I sleep. Missed the services this morning and tonight... heard they were good, will listen to tapes tomorrow... now i zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
Joyska at 8:52 PM
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Saturday, February 26, 2005

born to do it!

Have you ever been somewhere where you knew you were born to do this!? I thought I had. When I was up on the reserves and talking to kids and teenagers about life and positive choices and following their hearts, I thought, "okay, I was born to do this" I loved it. I loved watching the kids eyes get wide when we would talk about stuff that had relevence and meaning to who they were and spoke to the potential in them. But even then, it wasn't quite it. It was devoid of the God piece. I couldn't really give them my Testimony in full, because we weren't supposed to talk about God. So it was good, but it wasn't "it".

There were other times and things that I have done, that I felt were good and right. But never quite "it" either. But somehow, here in Kansas City, I feel like I am finding "it". Somehow this place connects with the long hidden and dormant desires of my life. Somehow what I am learning and growing in here, actually fits. I know I have only be here three weeks and it may all look different in three months, but I don't think so. My heart, spirit and mind are engaged here in a way that I have never been before. My purpose: to be at his feet and to be his hands, comes together as I sit in the prayer room asking for strategies and direction for both the Prayer Ground (early childhood)and for the upcoming outreach stuff in the spring and summer.

Even when I am sick (thick head cold :(, sore throat,etc.) there is an excitement and new strength. The Word is more alive than it's ever been, the worship is sweeter and more intimate than it's ever been, and I feel like, "yes, I was born for this." And the funny thing is... I haven't even really DONE anything yet. This (probably for the first time) isn't based on what I do, it's based on who I am... in Christ alone! Bare with me for awhile as I am in awe of what God is doing... I want to share the essence of it, and somehow only scratch the surface... Keep praying, our God is so good!
Joyska at 11:12 AM
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Thursday, February 24, 2005

Contend for the sending

Wow. This morning was Lenny's class that basically said, look if you want to lead into this next generation, we must learn how to forgive and to truly hear God's heart for today. He took three hours to say it and that is an oversimplification I am sure! He also talked about us (the leaders of today and tomorrow) as Pioneers. The world has never had it so messed up. Abortion, Gender issues, gangs, guns in schools, corrupt governments, all of it, is new playing field for the leaders of today's church. And it is impossible to do any of it with our own agendas and ideas. It's got to come from God.

Good. I agree and I'm tracking...

Tonight, Corey______, (i never caught his last name, but he is one of the teachers at the Forerunner School of Ministry out of IHOP) preaches out of Matthew 9 and says our job is to "Pray therefore" that the Lord of the Harvest would SEND (key word) Labourors into the harvest. Again, the premise being that we are to truly know God's heart and to wait for HIS sending. He made this statement... "too often we cheapen God's mandate by simply "going" (and praying for his blessing) without waiting to truly be sent" Interesting.

I know that is my heart for here and anywhere I will ever end up. I don't ever want to simply go because I think it is God's heart, or something that is good and right to do. I will wait and "contend for the sending".
Joyska at 10:33 PM
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Wednesday, February 23, 2005

Sicko

do you know those kinds of colds that come on so fast that you couldn't have out run them if you tried? It was inevitable. Pam has been sick for a week now, and 7 out of 12 Children's Equipping Center workers were out sick yesterday. Lenny was super sick when we got here, as were Joy and others. So now it's my turn. Granted, I will go and get prayer for healing every chance I get to pull myself off my comfy bed! I was fine most of the day, was feeling a little slower than my normal self, but thought it was just tired. Next thing ya know I'm sniffling like crazy and going through a box of Kleenex per hour... (okay a slight exageration) I feel like Meg Ryan in "You've got mail" where she is sitting on the couch saying: "my head feels fuzzy" Good description!

I did go to class this morning and listened again to Allan Hood as he spoke on the scriptural reasons to know the days we are living in. It was really powerful and helpful, as that has been one of my questions... why do we need to be aware? It comes down to this: Jesus tells us to. There of course are many scriptures to back that up, and many varying opinions on that as well. And yet, it makes sense to me.

There is so much information to take in. I'm enjoying so much of it. Tomorrow,(if i go) is my Apostolic Leadership class that Lenny LaGuardia is teaching. I really loved his class last week and am looking forward to the continuation of it tomorrow. His main premise thus far is simply that leadership is a calling that when taken seriously can help many find there place in the kingdom. He's a great speaker and is fun to listen to. Allan is too, he is just so intense... like well...pretty much all the teachers and preachers around here.

I find myself thinking a lot about the job at hand for me with the real little ones. And God is giving ideas and philosophy in a new way... Did you know for example that the Levites, when the census was taken after they had left Egypt, counted all the males ONE MONTH old and older? The rest of the census of Israel was of men 20 years old and able to fight... I find that very interesting, and has a lot to say about how we see our infants within the church... I could say more, but this isn't the time or place...besides my head is filling up more on one side than the other, so I should just go lay down and sleep.

Thanks by the way for all the comments... see it wasn't that hard!
Joyska at 11:30 PM
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Tuesday, February 22, 2005

I know you're reading...

I can tell you are checking in and reading the blog!!! Leave a comment... I crave interaction with familiar people!!!
Joyska at 6:50 PM
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shhh ...she's sleeping

Today was a good, quiet day. I actually slept into until almost 11:30!! I can't remember the last time that happened! Today was my day off and so i talked on the phone lots with friends who had both great news and hard stuff. Such is life. I spent most of the evening in the prayer room, praying reading, typing... it was really good. Tomorrow the "highly suggested" activity for the day is 8 hours in the prayer room in a row. An impossibility with my other responsibilities with the CEC, but I will do as much as my schedule allows. It's a great idea, and I think it will be really good.

I'm really missing my Winnipeg friends. Seeing so many of them drive away on Sunday was hard. Yet... it was so good... I know that there is always the phone, emails, and visiting back and forth, and this is where I believe I am supposed to be. So I dry up my tears... stick out my tongue (ask Yvonne) and keep moving forward. I'm meeting with a lot of the CEC staff this week and just vamping up for the big "take over" I've been thinking lots too about the outreach stuff and praying for divine strategies. Pray with me! I don't want to do anything that He's not a part of!

Thanks for your prayers already. I am headlong into my third week and feel great. Keep commenting! I love to hear what you think!
Joyska at 12:22 AM
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Sunday, February 20, 2005

Picture this

Picture the most exciting thing a kid could do. Got it? Would it look anything like this?

Children 6-12 years old praying for each other and seeing kids get healed. Small groups of children laying hands on each others shoulders and praying for the Spirit to come and touch their hearts. 50 children scattered through out the room in their own space, praying about serious issues like adoption vs abortion. 6-8 year olds reading a chapter a day of the Bible. 4-5 year olds being taught how to take every thought captive and then praying for God to gaurd their thoughts and their heart. 4 and 5 year olds with flags dancing all over the room to worship songs. a young 10 year old girl being trained up to RUN the children's area of a church in Mexico sometime in the next year. A worship team made up of all children, that leads a sweet worship and intimate intercession. A group of children being released to pray for the adults that are in the room. Do I need to go on? Any of these things excite you?

Today, as I walked through all the different areas in the Children's Equipping Center with the intention to simply meet face to face with all the current staff, I witnessed ALL of these things. And it made my heart glad. Someone has finally taken the longing of my heart and made it happen. Jesus has won the hearts of these children. And I couldn't be more excited about what God is doing in the children... from the snotty nosed baby, to the already seasoned worship leader who happens to be in grade 6. You have no idea.

Thank you Papa! Thank you for your Spirit that is alive and well in the hearts of ones made just big enough to hold it!

And then I said good-bye to 14 amazing people. The Winnipeggers. About them I will just say this... they blessed my richly with their friendship, and My blessing I leave with you... Be blessed in the name of the Lord.

I am in need of sleep now however. A certain blonde worship leader (other than Yvonne and Kim) kept me up talking into the wee hours of the night! So, now that the weekend is over, it is time to rest. Monday is my day off and I will take it off. Tuesday is for us Intro to IHOP-pers a "day of consecration" which basically means a challenge to spend 8 consequtive hours in the prayer room. THAT excites me.

Rest well, and know that I miss you all.
Joyska at 12:49 AM
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Saturday, February 19, 2005

Two weeks in

Well, I have been in Kansas City for two whole weeks. Two. In the words of Inigo Montoya... "let me explain... no there is too much, let me sum up..."

I am blown away.

Everyday there is a new teaching that bends my world view a little. Every day there is a new insight from scripture that I see as I spend time in the prayer room. Everyday I know that I have made the right decision to come here and be a part of something that will make a difference in this generation. I walk a little taller. I walk with a lot more confidence. I feel like I have a very specific mandate that is taking shape a little more each day. I know my heart is engaging in a way it NEVER has. I know that I miss being in the prayer room if I have too many classes or things to do. I know that this is only the beginning.

There are 14 people here from Winnipeg right now. They are catching a bit of the heart beat of the International House of Prayer. They are hearing words like "Bridal Paradigm" "Milleneal Kingdom" "Harp and Bowl" "the substantial and the ultimate" and are being touched by the very power and presence of God. Does it all make sense? Some of it. Some of it's brand new, some of it is mind bending, and some of it is begging the question "WHAT IN THE WORLD?" But all of it is drawing them into the prayer room, into the Word, and into a deeper relationship with God. It has been such an honour to watch God come to and in and on my dear friends.

Since my last post, I have been to 3 three hour classes, a training seminar (also three hours) to two restaurants with the Winnipeggers, to a meeting with Stuart Greaves who runs the Fire in the Night internship (which is the interns who pray from 12:00 am - 6:00 am) and heard his heart. The team has met with two of the main worship leaders here at "the house" and all of us are pretty tired. And we aren't done. There is another class tonight during the Encounter God Service (which everyone goes to) followed by a question and answer time with Mike Bickle if you are taking the class. Then tomorrow morning it is the Forerunner Christian Fellowship service where I will begin officially in my role as Director of Prayer Ground. It's a lot in very few days, but God's grace is more!

Monday is our day of rest... and rest I will!

For those of you following the Winnipegger's journey... there will be many stories to hear in the days to come of what God is doing in this little army of worshippers! YEAAH GOD!!!!!!!

There is so much I could say in this blog about WHAT I am learning, but that will come too. I just wanted to update everyone. Oh one more thing. Please pray for the following:

God is stirring a message in my heart regarding the priestly annointing on children and I want to steward it well. Pray for Gods thoughts and God's words as I begin to write it out and wrestle with it.

Also, the computer that I have (the laptop) is not compatable with the wireless system here and is a little too outdated to work with the computer programs that are being utilized here. I am finding it difficult to stay in communication with everyone here as I only have access to the admin computer in the early morning and late afternoons. Please pray for either... #1. Increased monthly support in order to purchase a computer or #2. A generous gift of a new laptop. It truly is a necessity here as it is the main communication system. That and cell phones. It is very difficult to get a hold of me at this point and that is already beginning to frustrate some people. Please pray for God's provision in this area! Thank you!!!!
Joyska at 5:23 PM
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Wednesday, February 16, 2005

I have this phrase from the movie "You've Got Mail" going through my head over and over again. Its where Meg Ryan is in the bookstore and she is getting carried away talking about books and she says

"when you read a book as a child it becomes a part of you like nothing else ever can."

And it has me thinking. What books and movies and TV shows are becoming a part of the children in this generation? Harry Potter? Lemony Snicket? Power Rangers? Pokemon? Interesting.

Allen Hood taught a class this morning on Cultivating the Presence of God. It was stunning. He spoke of creation and how we as image "bearers" were created with a longing... a loneliness. It was there before the "fall" so it is not a negative thing, it is a direct revelation of God's heart. That longing and loneliness was for our good, it was to draw us to his heart. He knew even then that we would mess up. He knew even then that we would literally KILL his son and push him away again and again and again. But he created us with a deep longing and INABILITY to be alone, that we would always have something that could bring us back to his heart.

Now, if we could get that into the heart of the children... wow.

I'm getting pretty blown away down here in KC. The blogs may tend to be more "preachy" for awhile, but at the same time, as God is tenderizing my heart, maybe there is something in it all for your heart too! (that what I am praying)!

One cool thing... 12 people from Winnipeg are coming here TOMORROW!!!! YEAH! I am so excited to see everyone, and I am so anticipating many stories of God Encounters! Bring it on!!!!
Joyska at 5:14 PM
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Tuesday, February 15, 2005

Fast...

Today at the IHOP mission base was the all staff fast day. Fasting is always a challenge for me, but there is something about knowing that 400 other people are doing it with you. It was a really good day. Everything shuts down here, no classes, no grueling schedules of meetings etc. (although I did manage to squeeze three meetings in this afternoon!) The only requirement of the day is to be at 2 of the prayer meetings. One at 10:00-12:00 and one at 4:00-6:00. These are not your ordinary prayer meetings. For starters there are 400-500 people there. (yes hundred! not 4-5) The theme this morning was for the writ that is before the Supreme Court Justices right now to reopen the Rowe Vs. Wade case (the "abortion" case). The decision to either open it and relook at, keep it closed or postpone their decision happens on Friday the 18th, so we spent two hours praying for the judges, for the moms, for the doctors and for the children. Pretty intense.

I love it though. There is little room for tolerance on some of these issues. As a Canadian, I think that it is easy to become dulled into thinking that tolerance is more "civil", more polite... and maybe it is in some instances, but there has to be a place where we take a stand too. Here they (and I) believe with all their hearts that abortion is wrong and so they go after it, not by condemning the people, or by walking a line with a big grotesque poster, but by coming to the courts of the King whose Justice is always just. The prayers are filled with grief and compassion and a longing to see the righteousness of God return to the land. The passion is evident in every prayer that is uttered. Just as there is little room for tolerance there is also little room for condemnation of the people involved. It's a delicate balance, but it makes sense to me.

Tomorrow and Thursday are my busiest days. Lots of classes and meetings, but I am anxious to get going on all this stuff. It's a big job... but I think I was born for this!
Joyska at 9:45 PM
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Monday, February 14, 2005

Mission Base Central

Monday morning... the sun is shining and I am sitting in my new office. I share an office with 2 full time Conference administrators, the teen director and one (sometimes 2) Children's Equipping Center Administrators. It's a good vibe. So if you are imagining a coke office repeat, you'll have to adjust your thinking. All that Coke stuff is now in my kitchen... which my Pepsi drinking room mate is none too thrilled. We do get along well however and she takes great delight in putting Pepsi in our fridge (Can you feel the shudder going through your body??!?!)

This week begins the intense busy time for me. I'm meeting with the current director of Prayer Ground (the 1-5 year olds) tomorrow morning and trying to wrap my head around what that is all going to entail for me. This week is also filled with meeting the current staff and beginning to build some relationships with people outside of this cozy office.

Children's ministry is an exciting place here. The kids are just running after God with all their hearts and I am beginning to understand the heart beat of this place.

I'm sure daily there will be other things that need to be learned and details to figure out, but there is a definite "Mission Base" feel to IHOP and I am really enjoying that.

Last night I went and just hung out at the Higher Grounds coffee shop and read for awhile in a Starbucks type atmosphere. It's right next door to the prayer room, and the other side of that is the Bookstore (Forerunner Bookstore -- where Yvonne's CD is for sale--) and then my office. Beside me is the multipurpose room, where a lot of the kids stuff happens and then there is the business office followed by Happy Heart Day Care and Nursery School, followed by the Thrift Store followed by Glad Heart reality. Invision a strip mall and you are seeing IHOP Missions base. They also have Forerunner School of Ministry, and the former Metro Christian Fellowship building. I am living in the Herrnhut apartments that IHOP also owns. It's quite a production here. AND everyone raises their own support!!!! Amazing.

Well, I'm off to figure out my schedule for the week.
Joyska at 9:50 AM
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Saturday, February 12, 2005

Go ahead, mess it up!

Well, it is Saturday and I can take a deep breath. I spent lots of time in the prayer room today and I just feel God downloading stuff almost everytime I go there. I feel the same in my apartment, in the car, just wherever I turn my heart toward him, I hear him speaking and challenging my thinking, my training, and most importantly my heart.

Thursday night shook me up a little in a good way. One of the staff here, Stuart Greaves spoke on a subject we don't talk about much... hell. It was sobering to say the least, but it was about the jealousy that God has for our hearts, and the hatred he has of sin. I'm still processing it all, but it was great.

I started the Intro to IHOP stuff now as well, so time is filled quickly, between prayer time, classes, department head meetings, and simply doing the work that I was brought here to do. there are moments when I feel overwhelmed, and there are moments when I feel like I could do all this and more. But there is always a sense that this is right on... and exactly where I need to be for this season of my life.

Pam and I have had a brutal time getting our phone set up. They are very cautious around here in the States. I had to prove a whole bunch of stuff before they would hook up our phone service. Then once I proved it all they said Monday was the earliest we could receive service. We have a message board in our kitchen and Pam put a simple prayer (more as a joke) God, please make our phone ring. To which I replied "Patience, my child, patience." Well wouldn't you know it, Friday we had service. We don't know how or why, it's just there. Yeah God!

So, everywhere I turn, I am seeing God's hand and it is good. Lenny keeps saying that I have the freedom to fail and really mess up so just go after it all! I like that philosophy. If you're not afraid to fail, you take a whole lot more risks. It's not about what happens on a Sunday morning... it's about what happens in the heart of the children! So... as I look to taking over the Prayer Ground, I'm thinking big, and creatively, and praying my heart out that everything wouldn't necessarily be perfect, but that it would have impact on the hearts, minds and destiny of the kids.

Sounds good to me!
Joyska at 12:23 AM
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Thursday, February 10, 2005

Ready, Set, Go!!!!

I met with Lenny today. If there was any question of being bored, or have nothing to do that is blown out of the water! You are talking to the new Director of Prayer Ground (age 1-5) for the first few months for sure to take it and develop it as it needs to be. Lenny has pulled me into senior level leadership and is throwing me in quickly! I will also be taking about 10 - 12 hours of classes a week for the first 3 months with the Intro to IHOP. (on top of the required 12 hours in the prayer room a week) But all I can say is Wahoo! This is going to be quite the ride!

Already I feel the grace of God as I have spent an average of 6 hours in the prayer room a day. I am experiencing a closeness that I have longed for and am so excited about the confidence that is growing in my spirit. Those all sound a bit like the "buzz words" in Kansas City, but they truly are truths to be experienced. I am getting incredible insights into Scripture as I continue to read as much as I can and I am so excited about the encouragements I am finding as I dig deeper.

Then there is the crazy anxiety this country (the USA) seems to be under. For my American friends it is not a slam, it's an observation. In order to get a phone here, I had to fax my passport, birth certificate, and Manitoba liscense in order to even be considered. To open a banking account you need a US issued ID. To get a US issued ID, you need a birth certificate, passport, license and entry visa. So I go down to the DMV to prove I am not a terrorist, and an hour later, I have no ID card, but a letter that needs to be sent to Jefferson City marked "Attention:FRAUD dept" and now I wait 4-6 weeks to prove that I am who I say I am. It's all good though. It's like I told the lady at the DMV -- "i'm a Canadian, we are a tolerant bunch"

Have I said that I am thrilled to be here? I just keep hearing "YOU HAVE NO IDEA" so we shall see what this means!
Joyska at 12:00 PM
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Wednesday, February 09, 2005

it found me!

It found me, and it only took 4 days!

I AM HERE IN KANSAS CITY!!! and it has been a crazy ride already. We arrived on Friday night after a grueling day of driving, praying, crossing the border, praying and getting a visa! My poor friends went ahead of me and the truck with all my stuff. They were all interigated harshly and mocked as they were trying to explain what the house of prayer even is. But when it came to my turn, they didn't ask me a single question out of the ordinary, and gave me a 3 year multi entry visa in less than 20 minutes!!

So 14 hours later, we arrived in KC and unloaded only enough to crash on the floor in my new apartment! (Which is huge and beautiful by the way!!!)

So the weather is gorgeous when we first arrive and all of us (Cheryl, Bev, Lanney, Jacob, Pam, and myself) are in great spirits, excited to be here and anxious to see what God will do. Saturday we spent emptying the truck and semi setting up the apartment. I have an Orange chair and a green table... and no other living room furniture, so we went to the local thrift store. We were there for all of 2 minutes and found my new living room set for just over a $100.00! It's two massive and comfortable chairs (one is a rocker) and a huge couch that fills in the gigantic living room quite nicely!

Cheryl, Lanney, Jacob and Bev were all greatly touched by God while they were here. I was excited about that. Jacob left Sunday AM and the Cheryl, Lanney, and Bev left early Monday. So Pam and I are here, excited about what is to come! Now that I have email and computer access again, I will update you on the specifics of the things going on state side!

Oh yeah, you may be wondering what found me after only four days. SNOW. Yep, it's a rare thing down here, but it found me... lots of it. They even closed the bookstore due to "inclement" weather. Too funny!

I miss all you Winnipeggers! Stay warm!
Joyska at 9:43 AM
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Wednesday, February 02, 2005

TWO DAYS!!!!!

Well, tomorrow AM I pick up the rental moving van. That is it, it's official. Let me update you on the incredible happenings so far.

1. I was given an ibook laptop computer!
2. I was given a digital camera!
3. I have no idea how to use either one!
4. I have friends who can show me!
5. There is a growing number of supporters (mostly generous one time gifts! as well as some faithful monthly support!
6. I sold my entire video collection! (if you know me at all, that one hurt, but I know it was the right thing to do)
7. I have eaten out almost every meal for more than a week!!
8. I have incredible friends!
Joyska at 7:13 PM
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